Tuesday, 10 June 2014

The Love Letter That Was Never Read

" I was falling head over heels for this girl and somehow I needed to express my feelings to her. But you see, I was the shy-type and I couldn't just walk up to her and tell her all about what i felt. Then I thought I'd tell her when I meet her online but then again after a lot of thinking I came to the conclusion that expressing your love for someone through the net didn't sound romantic. Then it struck me; why not write a letter? That was one of the oldest way of expressing your love for someone if you are too shy to say it up front. So it was decided that I would write a love letter.
I don't quite remember what I wrote in the salutation but I'm sure it was not dear...... because that'd be too forward. Anyway, what I do remember is the hint to my identity. And this is funny, you see, I had one of the worst handwriting  in the class and I assumed that she would recognize that and "you might know who I am because of my handwriting" was what I wrote at the very start of the letter. And then I started telling her how friends teasing turned into deep feelings. That I was falling for more and more with every passing time. 
Actually it was more of a confession than a love letter because I confessed my feelings for her but I didn't ask her to love me back. I told her that she needn't even respond to the letter in any way. I just wanted to express what was inside my heart. 
After I was satisfied with what I had written, the real problem popped up. How was I supposed deliver it? I knew that I couldn't just walk up to her and hand in the letter. I was never able to even walk up to her let alone talk to her. And I didn't want to send it through friends because I thought that something will surely go wrong if I sent it through a friend. What if they read it, or gave to someone else or maybe even read it in front of the whole class. I just couldn't take the risk. It was all up to me in the end.
I was the class representative during those days so I used that to my advantage. I was the first person to come in the morning because the key to the class was with me. So one day I went to school early and looked for a good spot to hide the letter on her bench. I had to make sure that no one else could find it. So I carefully placed it in between a small crack on the backside of her table. At the end of the day before I locked the classroom, I checked her bench and found the letter still there. I took the letter with me back home. Then I thought of placing the letter into her lunch basket but that was risky too. What if she read the letter out loud in front of her friends. "That would be embarrassing," I thought to myself. I still couldn't decide where to place the letter the next day. Before I checked out of the class, one fine day, I noticed that she had left one of her textbooks in the classroom only. I took the opportunity that had presented itself in front of me. I placed my letter inside her book. I was confident that it was a safe place and that she would discover it soon because she was someone who wouldn't part with her books for long. But I guess history wasn't her favorite subject because for the next few days I always found that same book on her table before I left the class. Then I finally gave up and took the letter back home and burned it. 
Until this day I don't know if she ever found the letter and read it. Maybe she read it and kept it back inside her book so that I don't notice. Or maybe she never found it. And I guess I'll never know what the letter had been through for those few days it lay hidden inside her book."
"Kids time for bed! That's enough for one day. Now let you grandpa Karma rest,"  came a voice from down stairs.
"But mom, we want to listen to more of grandpa's stories," the kids insisted, "and grandpa doesn't look tired at all, right grandpa?"
"Well, I am not tired at all but your mom is also right. Kids need to sleep on time and wake up in time for school." "but......" "ah ah aahh...... no 'if's or 'but's. You are grandpa's good boys, right? So you should listen to what I tell you. Plus there's a lot of time for me to tell you stories. Now be good kids and go to sleep." 
"Okay, if you say so grandpa", the kids left grandpa Karma's room with their heads hanging down with disappointment. 

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